Sunday, January 29, 2012

Maybe

Well, it has been almost two years and during that time I never felt like posting. Now, all of a sudden, I do.

I live in New Jersey.
I am in a PhD program, in Religious Studies.
I am five months' pregnant.

So, my plate is full.

What is the difference between a full plate and a running-over cup? I suppose it depends... but when your plate is full of blessings and opportunities, I think the difference is perspective. I am, indeed, taxed. So much is expected of my mind at school and even more, is that possible?, more is needed from me in this pregnancy.

it is not an easy pregnancy.

But it is a healthy one. So I am grateful.

In all this commotion, it is so easy to get overly, crazy-making busy. It gets hard for me to hear my own thoughts! Which brings me here. I want to be here because I have no time to be and every need for it. Because life is moving fast, does not seem to be slowing down, and I don't want to miss it.

{Speaking of missing}
Being so far away from Texas, I miss it. I do not miss what I thought I might. I am not given to missing spatial places, I miss, more often, time periods in my life, that kind of thing. But lately, I miss texas. I miss earthy Texas, the slower, grassy parts, the ones with star-filled skies at night and crickets.
And I miss San Antonio, down by La Villita. I won't try to tell you why i miss that particular place, but i do.

I try to ground myself here, in my new surroundings, but-
I find it so hard to be quiet and centered. Does anybody find that comes easily? Tell me your tricks.

There is so much more to write, but I don't want to do so all at once. I want a month's worth of posts that make me notice...

If you are reading this, I hope you are well.

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